How can I get my copy to flow?

Everything you say needs to have a logical connection.

You write emotionally, but make logical connections.

So if you have 4 points to cover:

A

B

C

D

You can write those out individually and have them make sense in isolation. In programming we’d loosely call this encapsulation.

Then once each part makes sense by itself, then you need to thread those 4 parts together.